The Unwritten Rules of Basketball

Lessons from the Court

I grew up playing basketball in America alongside the Dominican Republic, Iceland, Israel, and Costa Rica boys. Could you imagine a more multicultural way of getting to know each other? We played at the Alumni Village at Florida State University, where all our parents lived because they were foreign students. That’s where I found my love for the game.

Just recently, on my birthday, my daughter got me back into card collecting, bringing out all my 1990s cards. I came across an article that talked about the rules of street basketball. It reminded me of my days playing old-school games street ball games as a teenager playing 21.

Some streetball players don’t like making calls on hard defence. If I don’t like a style of play when a player is guarding me one week - when he is on my team, I’ll back him up; he’s on my side now. The game is rough and very physical. You come home with a bruise or two, and I’ve even caused an injury or two playing as an overly aggressive defender. I also play three-on-three on Sundays. These games are the one thing in my week that is completely immovable.

My love for basketball rekindled when I lived in the US and met my wife, Dallas. Liam and I signed up to the local LA Fitness in Austin, and there was always a game, no matter what time I went. I bought a new pair of basketball shoes and returned to the sport I loved after 20 years. I ran into my friend Kane and discovered that games were happening at the YMCA ‘chaired’ by Spinoff founder Duncan Greive.

The first rule of our group is that you must be in the WhatsApp chat, and it’s the first 12 to sign up in the chat get to play. Our community rules revolve around the game, and we usually play a zone defence. In reality, I only see these men and women on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but every time, it’s the best experience because I get to play the game I love with this baller community. The games start at 6:30 AM, but the rules we play for the full court don’t align with the official 3x3 FIBA half court court rules, which I played in Albany, that don’t translate back to our YMCA Tuesday and Thursday morning games. In both settings, defensive calls are based on honesty, and the culture is the same.

It’s probably one of the best systems you can imagine, although sometimes it falls on your teammates to tell you when you’ve caused a foul. The supportive environment is what I love most—seeing others who have taken up the sport, just like I did two or three years ago, and finding support. Whether you make or miss the shot, you’re encouraged to keep shooting. The only way to get better is through failure, and I’ve never found a more supportive environment than streetball for watching a player progress.

We all know that we're all better off when one player gets better. That person will eventually be on our side, so we want them to adapt to the game and understand the strategy and dynamics because it makes the gameplay better for everyone and reduces injuries. By the end of our games, we’re just competing for bragging rights; the reality is those last no longer than until the next game.

There’s no fun in playing a lopsided game, so there’s an unwritten rule about keeping teams fair and equal. Occasionally, one or two players will play on another level, and the game becomes about playing the highest level of defence to stop them. But no matter what team you’re on, if someone makes a phenomenal pass, an incredible behind-the-back play, or is on fire from three-point range, it doesn’t matter if they’re on your team or the opposing team—you celebrate how well they play.

You might not do it during the game, but in the end, everyone shakes hands. You don’t leave without giving someone a tap or a high-five. The game's energy is left on the court, and no matter what happens, friendships are renewed. Then we’re back to being regular guys —doing the dad and mum thing or the work thing—leaving behind our basketball alter egos on the floor with our mates, following those unwritten rules that balance competitive desire with the game we’ve loved and grown up with.

I want to share how street basketball's unspoken rules have shaped my view of community, sportsmanship, and personal growth.

Building Inclusive Communities

Our twice-weekly YMCA games are more than just exercise; they're a snapshot of community building. The first rule is simple: you must be in the WhatsApp chat, and the 12 spots are filled on a first-come, first-served basis. This straightforward system ensures everyone gets a fair shot at playing.

What stands out is how supportive everyone is. No matter your skill level, you're encouraged to take shots and learn from mistakes. As one player improves, we all get better. This team approach to growth creates a unique bond beyond the court.

Balancing Competition and Fair Play

Street basketball has unwritten rules that blend competitive spirit with good sportsmanship. The defence calls fouls in our games, relying on an honour system that prioritises integrity. While this can sometimes lead to disagreements, it reinforces fair play and mutual respect.

We also try to keep teams balanced. We know one-sided games aren't fun for anyone, so we aim to spread talent evenly. This ensures each game is competitive and engaging, pushing everyone to bring their A-game.

Appreciating Skill, Regardless of Team

One of the best things about our games is how we all appreciate great plays. Whether it's a fancy pass, a perfect cut to the basket, or a hot streak of three-pointers, players celebrate these moments no matter which team benefits. This shared admiration for skill goes beyond team loyalties and reminds us why we love basketball.

We always shook hands or high-fed after each session, no matter how intense the game was. This ritual reinforces the idea that what happens on the court stays there, allowing us to leave our competitive sides behind and return to being friends and colleagues.

Lessons That Go Beyond Basketball

The principles guiding our street basketball games offer valuable insights that apply to life off the court:

1. Inclusive communities are stronger

2. A supportive environment helps personal growth

3. Fair play and integrity are essential to meaningful competition

4. Appreciating others' successes can make our own experiences better

5. Separating competition from personal relationships is important

Thinking about these unwritten rules, I'm struck by how they've made my life richer both on and off the court. They've taught me the value of community, the importance of good sportsmanship, and the joy of continually improving.